Sometime ago, I noticed that my youngest son was making comparisons. “Mom, do we have those kinds of cats in our world?” We were watching one of his favorite cartoons. It wasn’t the first time he was asking about “our” world while watching a show. I also noticed something else. The boys seemed to be comparing “our” world’s people (themselves included) with the characters in these shows.
I started making other connections to some behaviors and words I have noticed with them and other kids…stuff I hadn’t thought about before, specifically. This started because after having children, I began looking for casual ways to listen and to learn more from children. I started asking questions and making statements to these kids.
All of these kids in particular, are very intelligent, full of character and, have their own amazing abilities- like we all do. The things is… I don’t think there has been a lot of emphasis on these kids’ specific strengths. I do always hear about grades and sports… the habit to which we are accustomed, in the states…
One of these kids, is a 6-year-old girl who speaks like a wise elderly woman. She told me that she was having a difficult time with a cousin. She said, “I love my cousin but, I need space from her. We are different and that is okay. We just need time to be apart.” It makes me smile to listen to a tiny girl speak in this way. Many adults have a hard time understanding a thing like, allowing space. I said to her, “You are Amazing!” She insisted that she was not special or amazing at all. I think, it was her tone and expression that took me by surprise. She wasn’t just stating a point. She looked down at the ground and frowned. Imagine if she knew she was awesome!
She wasn’t the only one to say that she isn’t special. I have challenged this reply with the question, “Why aren’t you special?” I normally hear something like, “I am normal.” Or, “I wish I could sing better.” Or, “My grades aren’t that good.” Or, they don’t answer with much more than a shrug.
An obvious question came to me.
How are our children defining “special”? Are all of these fictional characters having some kind of impact on our kids? Maybe, its not just these fictional characters.
Maybe we have forgotten what “special” means. Or, maybe we have mixed up ideas of reality and fantasy.
“Truth is stranger than fiction because, fiction is obliged to stick to possibilities. Truth isn’t.”
Mark Twain
Some of us may think the opposite is true. Read more. Get more curious. Reconsider your ideas on truth and reality. Oh, and forget anything that supports a false idea that reality is boring. It isn’t true. Its just that people are not in the habit of considering anything that isn’t within our norms. We are trapped within “normal” group think. We are a part of one crazy awesome world where literally anything can happen in a blink. Some of us know this because, we have experienced it…where one single encounter changed everything or, taking a light stroll put us in the right place…how does this just happen? The very thing we needed or wanted…just happens…?
Super Powers
I think common ideas of what special means, ideas of reality and fantasy and super powers are all tied together and, it is confused. We all have a super power but, we have to practice our powers. Our kids never see fictional characters practicing anything.
The main point…I think a lot of kids compare themselves to fictional characters and fictional ideas of “special”…colorful bodies, special powers that require no effort to strengthen or maintain, endless gadgets and material tools, certain facial features, a group of forever loyal followers, problems that are solved in an hour…. Intellectually, we can discern between fantasy and our human world however, “special” somehow gets removed from our own beingness. I think this is one component to how human beings become challenged, caged, bored, stuck and low.
Does this all sound weird to you? Maybe you are denying your awesomeness because, someone didn’t validate your unique awesomeness.
So what might your super powers be?
Being a teacher who can translate knowledge to students is a super power. Being in this world and functioning from Honesty is a super power. Kindness is a super power. Patience is a super power. Creativity is a rare super power that is also an ability to problem solve. Being able to swim in the dark moments of life or, being able to create light moments from pain…super powers too. Ever have the same dream as someone you know? Being connected to someone you love, IS a super power. I know dreams are a common super power. I’ve been privileged enough to hear about some of them. True happiness is also a super power. Why? A truly happy person is an example. So many people want to be like something but, they don’t have the examples from which to learn.
We practice our powers. You’ve been around people. You know we all have different abilities and tools within ourselves.
How many of us work on our true abilities? Is it just coincidence that you have some special thing about you? Use your tool, more. As you do, you many begin to notice that other abilities are growing and that things are coming together. Stuff starts to happen. Enlist help from other people who practice their abilities. The company you keep is so important. Or, it is something to reconsider.
Meditate
Have you ever heard an artist or writer talk about how they created something like a painting or a film script? A lot of them speak as though information was being funneled to them like, as if the artwork wasn’t theirs like, as if it were passed on to them, somehow. Well-known people have talked about getting some of their best ideas while meditating or meditating on something. I am not talking about Hot Yoga or, whatever they have done to yoga, now. Clearing your mind can happen anywhere, anytime. This is a super power we can all practice and improve.
Forget cartoonish ideas of special.
By the way, some of those films and comics have a take away meaning and it isn’t that you should wish to be like those characters… you already have *special* in you and so do our kids.
Have you ever seen a celebrity in person? Were they anything like their persona in the media? Some of these people know their super powers and it isn’t necessarily what they get paid for…but, they worked on themselves and, used their internal tools to get the materials and/or recognition they wanted.
Be honest with yourself for a moment. What is your ability? NO, no, don’t be hard on yourself, don’t default to denial…sit, breathe in, exhale. Smile.
Now what is your super power?
Recently, I heard someone say that our spirits already know everything but, that we come to life for just 2 lessons. Emotions and limitations…she was basically saying that everything can be brought back to these two lessons. What do you think? Can everything be reduced to how we handle emotions or limitations?